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OH NOES! SHARKACIDE! SUI-SLIDE! DEAD SHARK HUMOR -- NO!

So according to a video on this MSN website a shark committ suicide at the Atlantis resort in the Bahamas.

Shark jumps into resort pool

Allegedly, a 12 year-old female reef shark jumped from its tank and into a popular, kid-friendly water slide that shoots sunburned tourists underwater through the shark tank. See the breakdown here.
I have several problems with this incident. Problem #1: Why do people find this so funny? This is not funny. This is sick. That shark DIED. She probably had kids who are now in danger of committing suicide themselves (it's genetic in sharks, right?). #2: Why hasn't PETA attacked this Atlantis behemoth yet and thrown blood all over the children as they go down this slide? If you are going to attack celebutards for wearing fur then you have to show equal treatment to the regular men, women, and children who slide through that tube of death with a smile on their face.
This is just further proof that Atlantis Paradise Island is the worst. I'm sorry for that shark. If I had to go there I'd probably kill myself too. The all-inclusive resort thing where people pay lots of money to stay in an artificial paradise that is completely cut off from the country it's situated in is not my taste. Whats the point? Gross. Gross. Gross. Hey, I'm not going to tell people what they can and can't do. If going to a place because it feels like home without actually being home (some people just want to eat a big cheeseburger and fries while they roast on the beach) makes you happy, then you do that. But when that kind of lifestyle makes animals want to kill themselves then the people who feel the need to visit Atlantis need to do one of two things: stay in New Jersey, or demand that the miserable animals be put back into their habitat. The Atlantis shark tank is big, but its not the ocean. Also, I really hope that the Atlantis closed the slide and drained the pool of dead shark germs so that revelers don't get sick (I do not really hope that the Atlantis disinfected the pool).

The one comfort I can take from this is that maybe the shark had some fun on the slide before suffocating to death in a chlorine pool.
sick.

posted by Bagel @ 9:00 AM